My
Brains are Leaking
January 23, 2010 at 10:58pm
If I am very quiet...
- I am enjoying the mental conversation I am having with myself
- I am biting the inside of my cheek to keep from saying something completely offensive to you
- I know I will not be heard over the screeching of your child
- I will soon have my brains explode out of my ears
- I'm having violent thoughts involving my metal nail file, a rusty six penny nail, and your eyeballs
- I'm dead
If I didn't know a Valium would knock me out until Monday morning, I'd pop one right now. I am just not made to be in the same room as small children for more than an hour. Call it wiring gone wrong, a cold, callous heart, or genetic misfiring, but I really really really dislike small children who don't know their place in the world. Which in my world, is in a corner with duct tape around wrists and ankles and a dirty rag stuffed in their mouth.
I don't care if its no longer in vogue...there's something to be said about children being seen and NOT heard. Adults gathering for a nice visit should have the common sense that if they bring their children, they should CONTROL their children. Not allow them to run full speed through someone else's house, not allow them to sample food from trays and leave morsels with bites out of them on the trays, monitor how much they are drinking, keep them from running up and down a flight of stairs, and for gods sake, when that god awful screech comes out of their mouth, do us all a favor and crack the ever living shit out of them and really give them something to make noise about.
Children that behave like that belong in a horror movie, because no one feels bad when they get run over by a semi and are buried in an ancient Indian burial ground and need to be killed all over again.
- I am enjoying the mental conversation I am having with myself
- I am biting the inside of my cheek to keep from saying something completely offensive to you
- I know I will not be heard over the screeching of your child
- I will soon have my brains explode out of my ears
- I'm having violent thoughts involving my metal nail file, a rusty six penny nail, and your eyeballs
- I'm dead
If I didn't know a Valium would knock me out until Monday morning, I'd pop one right now. I am just not made to be in the same room as small children for more than an hour. Call it wiring gone wrong, a cold, callous heart, or genetic misfiring, but I really really really dislike small children who don't know their place in the world. Which in my world, is in a corner with duct tape around wrists and ankles and a dirty rag stuffed in their mouth.
I don't care if its no longer in vogue...there's something to be said about children being seen and NOT heard. Adults gathering for a nice visit should have the common sense that if they bring their children, they should CONTROL their children. Not allow them to run full speed through someone else's house, not allow them to sample food from trays and leave morsels with bites out of them on the trays, monitor how much they are drinking, keep them from running up and down a flight of stairs, and for gods sake, when that god awful screech comes out of their mouth, do us all a favor and crack the ever living shit out of them and really give them something to make noise about.
Children that behave like that belong in a horror movie, because no one feels bad when they get run over by a semi and are buried in an ancient Indian burial ground and need to be killed all over again.
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